I used to take pictures

I used to do a lot of things
I no longer do
and I absolutely miss all of it

we have had rats running through our kitchen at night
I've learned how to catch them
but they let out a heart wrenching squeak when they are stuck
and it makes me feel terrible
it is not up to me
I should never have to be the decider of fate for these small creatures
but after I caught the first rat
I immediately understood what was to come next
because there was no way to release this animal once its been captured
it begins to suffer and cry
so I set a trap and place it next to the
rat's head
it begins to thrash around and eventually sets off the trap.
the creature is killed instantly
I used to pray for the rats when they died
I no longer do
I don't know why I stopped
it's very unsettling to kill something without remorse
then hurry back to bed angry because of the lost sleep

I used to take pictures of sunsets